okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
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