I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
