its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
no you cant smoke seaweed
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
