Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
God I need to hump something, right now.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
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