Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Be still, my beating vagina.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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