u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
