Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
