Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
