How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
