Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
