I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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