I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Randomize
