are you so shy because you have an std?
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Randomize
