Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
