Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Randomize
