And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize
