My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize