you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Randomize
