why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
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