oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Randomize
