just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Randomize