And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
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