does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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