Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
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