If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Randomize
