But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
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You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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