so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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