I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
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