BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize