According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?