I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs