Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Randomize
