what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
try to milk me bitch
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize