Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
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