Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Randomize
