I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
