Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize
