Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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