Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
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