If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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