Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
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