were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
