she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
