In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
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