just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
You have to summon your inner elephant
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Randomize
