I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Randomize
