Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
And then the night went full on bisexual.