How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Randomize
