Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Randomize
