Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
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