Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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