We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
