Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
